The worst thing is holding on to someone who doesn’t want to be held on to.

idk why u text me today, honestly why? do u really care? do u really want to be my friend?! I'm not use to that, someone actually fighting to be my friend, usually its me frighting to keep someone as my friend. honestly i dont understand why anyone would want to be my friend, but yeahh... I really dont get you, Even when i clearly know ur not interested i still get conflicted feelings from u. you said i could trust u 100% idk if i trust that, you could just be bullshitting me but why would u? Its not like u went out of ur way to contact maria or jess when u noticed they were missing, why did it bother u so much that i havent been talking to u? I dont get it. but the more i dont get it the more i keep holding on to something thats not there. Something i dont even want anymore. I just miss having a stable thing, I'm not use to being on my own i always had maria and jess when i was at school, now i have to do things by myself and it freaks me out a little but i like it, im just lonely. BUT I'm finding someone new and different and who actually appreciates me, bc lifes too short to hold on to nothing and to not feel liked back.