I Believe

I would like to think youre with me all the time. I talk to you even without thinking about it. I'd like to believe you answer in your own ways and always watch over me. I think whenever I feel really sad is when youre around me more bc I can feel your presence. I remember when it first happened and I tried to be strong, as strong as you are (were), I told you to watch over daddy bc he really needed it, and I remember asking you to come back bc I needed you. More than ever I need you. I've been dreaming about you a lot lately. Missing you doesnt even cover it. I cant breathe when I think about you, even writing this, its the worst pain, I try not to think about you a lot but it always happens. I could never forget you, but i'm forgetting the details and I'm very big on the details, I cant remember what use to be my life. I cant remember waking up and going downstairs to you doing the crossword puzzles, and that was just an everyday occurrence. Oh what I would give for that simple everyday occurrence. This morning I woke up to my alarm and I of course pressed snoozed but I had to study and I heard your voice say "wake up sleepy head" you use to say that a lot, I forgot about that. I wish that you could help me find my way, I feel lost again. I guess I'll never fully feel found, but I'll settle for anything better than this.