I need a plan

I dont know what I want to do with my life and thats the scariest thing. Its already August, I was suppose to have done great things by now. Instead I've been focusing on things that dont matter and just putting off things that do. Today I finally realized that and tried to make up for lost time, I hope its not too late, please God don't let it be too late. I need to get into a research lab, I've been holding on to Sabines for so long, but like everything else i think i was stupid and shouldve just let go and tried to find something else. I guess if worse comes to worse I'll have to take another semester I wouldnt know what to take in that extra semester but I need to talk to someone. I guess I feel dumb not knowing by now what I want to do. I would love to be a cosmetic scientist but I dont know what I would have to do for that. I wish i got that internship last semester bc they're not doing it this semester. I keep saying maybe i'll go into research but idk if i even like that or what i need to do for that. I really just need to get my act together and focus and stop messing around. Its time to grow up, unfortunately. My grades are bad and that sucks but the only thing I can do is just study and try harder. Hopefully from now on I will actually be focused, I mean I'm gonna be a senior I should have it all figured out by now, right?!

Stressing out about this just made me realize how insignificant the other things I've been stressing about this past summer. Life always gets in the way, but you cant exactly tell the person at an interview that you have back stabbing friends or you like assholes, all that shows is grades and volunteer work, in the end nothing else matters. I should figure out my life first before I actually live it.