Fuck you 1% fuck you.

I actually went through old pictures and stuff and I realized he doesn't like me simple as that. Yea he can treat me nice but he also treats me like shit, its not okay and very deja vu. I've done this twice already where I stop talking to him because he's just not a nice person and then months go by and I forget about it and then I see him and am reminded of why I liked him in the first place because he's nice to me to keep me around for reasons I will never know. But it's really all a lie. He may care for me but it doesn't go that far. I always wondered how he would act with someone he did like and I now know the answer, he liked Jess, it's clear now. I ignored it then because it was too hard to face. He never acts the way he did with her. Maybe it's a different kind of "like" but I'm done with this little bit of hope I still have for him. And how he can make me think that I'm not good enough for him. He makes me feel fat and ugly and while those may or may not be true he doesn't have any right to make me feel bad about myself, I do that enough. My gut is screaming at me that he doesnt like me, I should trust it. I'm just a hopeful person simple as that. But this shit is getting old. He is nothing special at all. He's just familiar and I'm bored. I think I just wanted so badly to prove everyone wrong, including him, that we were right for each other. But when you're batting against the person involved its a losing battle. You win pj. I will stop bothering you. White flag in. I'm done.